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Thread: How to Treat Your Wife

  1. #1
    Senior Member Wingfoot's Avatar
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    Default How to Treat Your Wife

    Found in the August edition of Golf Digest; Letters From Our Readers:


    ADVICE FROM A RETIRED HUSBAND :

    It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are over-sensitive, and there's nothing worse than an over-sensitive woman.

    My name is Mike. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Jane. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Jane to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits we need.

    Shortly after she started working at her full-time job, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home every day from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have my lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.

    She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

    Another symptom of aging is the constant complaining. For example, she will tell me it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

    When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

    I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Jane. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I on how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.

    Signed,
    Mike

    ------------------------------------------------

    EDITOR'S NOTE:

    Mike died suddenly on January 7 of a perforated colon. The police reported Mike was found with a Calloway extra-long, 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his a** , with barely 5 inches of grip showing, and a sledge hammer laying nearby.

    His wife Jane was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took just 10 minutes to find her "Not Guilty;" accepting her defense that Mike, somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.

    ------------------------------------------------

  2. #2
    Conservative Meanie ifinditunderground's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Treat Your Wife

    The wife and I got a good laugh out of that one.
    There is a fine line between "Hobby" and "Mental Illness."
    "America isn't free, in America you are free to follow the rules." -Anthony Cumia


  3. #3
    Senior Member sprayandpray's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Treat Your Wife

    Good one Wing.
    I might not be as good as I once was, but I'm as good once as I ever was !


    It's better to be Pissed Off than Pissed On or Stood On and Pissed Off Of !


    The views expressed on this website/blog are mine alone and do not reflect the views of my employer. or my wife , if that matters.

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