Interesting locates, etc.

[X-ray specs]

Seeing how our offices are on four wheels, and seeing a co-worker can be as long as weeks to months I think it takes a special reclusive person to do this job. However things can get boring and rather than chain smoking cigarettes on the way to the next troubleshoot maybe it would be interesting to tell a story over the phone cause you know we are all long winded on the phone. I am new here but have been locating I'll just say awhile. I have been on locates where I am thinking to myself: "Self, you are a stupid jackass for even getting outta the truck. That St. Bernard could literally drag you in the woods and no one would ever find you." Been chased by pit bulls, shoulda never run, but sometimes the brain tells ya to move your feet and your feet don't disagree. Also I have been told by a homeowner that if he ever caught me or anyone else on his property that He would be on the front page of the paper the next morning. Now, maybe it is just me but I laugh at the most inappropriate times. I gotta say sometimes people are insulted, being shushed at a theater during a dramatic scene is always a treat but you gotta have fun at what you are doing otherwise it is not worth doing.

[FailedSafetyAudit]

Being alone all day is the only reason I'm still in this industry.

I heard a story from one locator in particular, they were locating gas in the city at an apartment building. Apparently a drug dealer was living in one of the units, heard the locator screwing around with the gas meter outside, and threw open the door while brandishing a double barrel shotgun out of paranoia. Nobody got hurt luckily.

[UULC]

My best locate was in Sarasota, Fl while marking Verizon and FPL in a rear easement and walked back there after hooking up to a ped and seeing several females tanning themselves in the nude. I apologized and tried to give them time to cover up. They never moved and I marked out the phone and power. I went to take photos and they actually wanted in them. So USIC has photos attached to the ticket.

[TheCableVine]

I've heard the stories about sunbathers and people standing in the window, nude, but I've never seen it. Maybe that's a good thing. Maybe Monday will be my lucky day.

[X-ray specs]

Ok, here is another story. One that is near and dear to my heart. Maybe I only think it is funny but nonetheless here goes. Back in the time when we still used paper maps and the tickets were faxed to a centrally located office every morning. I had to pick up another guy to run him to go get his truck which was getting repairs. Back then I drank as if I single-handedly could Put a dent in the world liquor supply. I am sure I put Mr. Bacardi's kids though college. No more though, it takes so long to heal and shoveling the driveway really kicks the rear. Back to the story... I had to drop a deuce in the worst of ways and I could feel the steering wheel mold to the shape of my hands as I clenched in more ways than one. Finally I dropped the guy off and instead of destroying the bathroom at the shop I stupidly thunk to myself "I can make it." It got to the point where it was not really up to me anymore, the nearest place was a porta potty across a soccer field. Switching the rawls on, I jumped the curb and drove cross country style to what was looking to me like the answer to all the questions I ever had in life. That blue box sitting there on the edge of that field had my name on it. As I scrambled out of the vehicle, probably looking like a half deranged lunatic who rode the short bus. "I had made it!" Frantically pulling the door open, I didn't make it. I still feel bad for whoever had to clean that. I imagined they would have just lit that sucker up. True story, not embarrased one bit. It has happened to all of us in one way or another. And if it hasn't it will. You start life in diapers and your gonna go out wearing them too.

[UULC]

Too funny X-Ray.... I bet you felt better instantly.

[Mke]

Well, I havn't (Knock on wood) had the explosive experience in a Porta Potty. I havn't had the half naked women show themselves during a locate. The closest I have to that would be a 30something tweaker not wearing a bra and bending over alot during a locate.....unless you count the tweaker who was selling "home videos" of her self... either way I wasn't writing into penthouse forum.

The wierdest situation I ever found myself was in Downtown Portland. I was doing a Sewer inspection on a residence in SE Portland. I pulled up to the site and found two guys standing out front. (Not unusual). I went up to introduce myself and one of the guys went to shake my hand and in one solid motion took my hand and pulled me past him to the other guy. At this point I had no idea what was going on. I looked behind me and the guy who pulled me through was talking to a 18ish male with a 12" kitchen knife. The 18ish male never spoke and only stood there grinning. We scampered off into the house and within a minute or so got a call from the city inspector who was trapped in his van by the 18ish male. We proceeded to call the police. In about 10 min we seen the police drive slowly by the house and went out and told them the male was in a duplex accross the street. Then we sat back and watched them enter the appartment and beanbag him, and then taser him before they shackled him and dragged him out of the apt.

It was kinda cool, glad he wasn't overly aggressive.

Mke

[TMO]

Turned the corner on the back of a house on south Waco, walked right into about 12 four foot pot plants under a little tin awning. Found the SNI on the back of the house, i got thier drop marked about halfway to the rear easement, and the 'way to cool for 0900' homeowner stepped out the back door. We exchanged 'hello's' , i told him what i was doing, he calmly (surprising huh) waited til i was done and left. Not a word about anything , just high and bye.

[Turk182]

Last summer I had a house that was getting a pool and a pool house getting installed, I went out for the initial pool ticket and while I am in the backyard doing my job I see the homeowner vacuuming the all glass family room on the back of the house wearing nothing but a smile. She looks up and sees me, and I fully expect her to freak and run to a phone to call the cops, she just waved at me and continued vacuuming. I had a ticket for that house at least once a week for a month and a half, and never once saw that woman wearing clothes, she even gave me a bottle of water in the buff.

[BD2U]

This is just a funny locate for me. Back when we used solvent based paint, I had a project for installing CATV in a new phase of a sub-division. Well I marked all my gas in the phase. About 2 days later I get a call from the contractor wanting to know why I marked all of the area except for a corner lot. Well I met him onsite to see what he was talking about. When I got onsite I found that the lot in question was a corner lot, that has gas on 3 sides of the property. Well I knew that I had marked it. This house was also the "Show House" for the sub-division. They had pulled all of my flags and cut the grass down to that of a golf course. So me in my A-Hole state of mind, sprayed a Solid yellow line, 3" Wide. The line stretched from behind the house in the alley, around the east side of the house as well as on the north side of it. I used 2 cans of paint and an entire bundle of flags for this one house. The people came out when I was done and was quite pissed. I told them next time to leave the original marks alone. They got even more pissed when I told them that, that they wanted to speak to some one. So the called my supervisor, and Atmos (TXU Gas at the time). My supervisor just laughed and Atmos told them the same thing I did. Atmos told them that in the future they will think twice about destroying the marks.

[HalfTracK]

Just yesterday I had a lady yelling at me about a gas marker at a valve that was just installed at the entrance of her subdivision. Apparently she was the HOA President.. She was quite pissed..

[big boots mcghee]

My best locate was in Sarasota, Fl while marking Verizon and FPL in a rear easement and walked back there after hooking up to a ped and seeing several females tanning themselves in the nude. I apologized and tried to give them time to cover up. They never moved and I marked out the phone and power. I went to take photos and they actually wanted in them. So USIC has photos attached to the ticket.

I don't care how you do it, find those photos!

[X-ray specs]

Too good, a lot of experience out there. I love this job. If it paid better it would beat any office job any day. Never seen anyone flappin their hoo hoo dilly while vacuuming; and to be honest that could go one of two ways. One, you leave with a smile and end up calling in the damn remark tics yourself. Or you wish that the spray can was still solvent based because the water based solution just won't remove the etched in image on your retinas. Another one for me though. Just last year I had a ticket I was marking for the install of fiber lines. I was out there to do a troubleshoot on some gas because the contractor could not find a line that someone else had marked. I get out there and start hooking up. Just as I finish 1 house the homeowner comes home and doesn't really even aknowledge that I am there. I continue to walk away and then one guy gets out with a couple cases of beer. I can't remember what type, but I know that it was some off brand and nothing really worth drinking or spending your dough on. The other guy gets out and starts layin into me, he's 3 sheets and the adrenaline just dumps into my system thinking this guy might think he is superman right now. I was not the friendliest to him and he asks to see some I.D. I start walking away and he flips out even worse. At this point he makes the bee line to the house and I am prepared for the worst ( I thought he was gonna get the hole maker.) So I get into my truck and pull it around to get into a better position to flee if he is dumb as I presumed he was. Nope he comes out a few minutes later, just relaxed as could be. (No idea) he politely asks to see my I.D. again and I show it to him and he leaves. The worst part of this entire scene is that the crew I was helping was 25' away from me on the other side of the road and didn't speak a word to this guy to tell him I was there because of the utility work going on. Later that day I put in a request for a bullet resistant vest. The longer I do this job, the more I believe we will be wearing them in just a few years.

[Wingfoot]

Last summer I saw the homeowner vacuuming in the all glass family room on the back of the house wearing nothing but a smile. She looks up, sees me, just waved and continued vacuuming. I had a ticket for that house at least once a week for a month and a half, and never once saw that woman wearing clothes! She even gave me a bottle of water in the buff!

Wah............ Wah............ WoW!

----------------------------------------------------

[TMINTH]

I don't know about you guys, but my library has mp3 players with audio books loaded on them (yes, I'm a reader). I've gone through about a hundred of these, because I don't like to be alone with my thoughts. This helps immensely with the boredom/loneliness. If you're not into books, but have a smartphone, the I heart radio app is also a lifesaver.

Here's a couple funny stories I have myself:

I was at one locate when the nozzle of my paint can popped off. It didn't break, just came off. So I picked it up off the ground, tilted it up, and pushed it back down. That was a dumba$$ move, resulting in my face looking like a Florida orange (thank God I wear glasses).

Another locate I was at, I had my head down (how else are you supposed to see what you're marking). I got closer to the house, and didn't notice how close I was to this tree/bush thing that had thorns on it. There surely must be a God, because one 1.5" long thorn got under my glasses, straight into my eye between my tear duct and the actual eyeball. It was pretty scary, but a funny story to tell.

Seeing how our offices are on four wheels, and seeing a co-worker can be as long as weeks to months I think it takes a special reclusive person to do this job. However things can get boring and rather than chain smoking cigarettes on the way to the next troubleshoot maybe it would be interesting to tell a story over the phone cause you know we are all long winded on the phone. I am new here but have been locating I'll just say awhile. I have been on locates where I am thinking to myself: "Self, you are a stupid jackass for even getting outta the truck. That St. Bernard could literally drag you in the woods and no one would ever find you." Been chased by pit bulls, shoulda never run, but sometimes the brain tells ya to move your feet and your feet don't disagree. Also I have been told by a homeowner that if he ever caught me or anyone else on his property that He would be on the front page of the paper the next morning. Now, maybe it is just me but I laugh at the most inappropriate times. I gotta say sometimes people are insulted, being shushed at a theater during a dramatic scene is always a treat but you gotta have fun at what you are doing otherwise it is not worth doing.